so i went to a party last night at the delancey, where my girl najy was go-go dancing. was a queer\lesbian event. sexy women everywhere. i gave one of the go-go dancers a dollar, and she leans down… “can i kiss you?” sure thing, ma. that made me happy. but then i realized that she kisses every girl who gives her a dollar, and that made me laugh. girls like that, though they are sluts, will never stop being attractive. so, i got a few free drinks and danced with a few people and chased a few people around, but then left, at 3 am, with no lesbians crawling at my feet.
i think they can all tell that im in a stable, happy relationship. at one point in the night, i went up to najy, who was fluttering from girl to girl and turning all of them on, and i asked her why i was having so much trouble getting a girl to want me. she looked at me straight in the eye and yelled (it was loud in there) something to the effect of “you have an amazing boyfriend. you’re lucky.” and it made me realize that people can probably tell, and i dont mind one bit.
but it was really nice being in that scene again. the drama flowing through the air at lesbian bars is crazy. all the girls are out on the prowl, and i just sat back and watched. until i got drunk enough, then i played the game to no avail. i miss the blatant sexual cues, and the cute little flirty eyes that girls do, and the way that butch women dance (hah). it was kind of like revisiting the past, of sorts. i used to yearn to go to places like that. now i end up hanging out with the old lesbian in the corner who is there just to get drunk and watch the show. you and i both, grandma.
